Do Catholics still want to know the truth?

Detail of Adam and Eve, by Lucas Cranach the Younger, 1537

Do you sometimes ponder why no one taught you the Catholic Faith properly and why you are still not being taught the most basic things?

How is it that today’s Catholic can be alive for several decades, go to Mass weekly, read Catholic news, follow Catholic “influencers” by the dozens, and yet never hear foundational truths of the Faith that have been standard for, oh, a couple thousand years?

I’ve thought a lot about it in the past week.

On April 20, Catholic Answers courageously published a piece I wrote, entitled “7 Pro-Abortion Arguments that Work for Divorce, Too.” The article demonstrated just that: the arguments used for divorce are the same as the arguments used for abortion. That’s it. That was my premise, and all seven points were pretty cut-and-dry.

In the firestorm that followed (played out mainly on the Catholic Answers facebook page), no one disputed my thesis or even tried. However, many people disliked a strawman subtext of my first point, and the outrage about the piece started and ended right there, thus perfectly proving my point:

1. Hard cases. Whenever anti-abortion or anti-divorce arguments are made, there is an immediate appeal to the “hard cases.” For abortion, the reflexive retort is, “What about rape, incest, or the life of the mother?” The counterpart for divorce is, “What about abuse?” The Church, and reason alone, provide excellent responses, yet the person posing the question is generally trying to shut down debate on these issues to promote the status quo.

Apparently, the link provided for those “excellent responses” was not enough to satisfy some readers, and when the backlash got more fierce, the following was added to #1, to provide even more clarity:

(For more about what the Church teaches on “hard cases” and the need for physical separation, go here: When Does the Church Tolerate Divorce?)

None of that information mattered, though, and the indignant comments bypassed any concern for actual, official Church teaching:

”Okay so the woman being beaten to death in front of her children should remain married to allow her husband to keep sinning against her and their children.”

”Ummm abuse is a valid reason for divorce.”

”I was in [an abusive] situation and my priest told me that God does not expect anyone to stay in that situation and therefore you would be granted an annulment with no problem in that situation!” [Note: This comment also goes to prove #5 and #7 of my article.]

The objections went on…. and with the inevitable declaration that my piece was “hurtful.”

Having previously and frequently experienced—and answered—this type of response to the issue of marriage permanence, I was not at all surprised. But I do get frustrated when it occurs, and a couple of things always spring to mind:

1. It’s bizarre that these Catholic women (and it’s almost always women) assume that anyone who argues against divorce has no experience with or understanding of “hard cases” or abusive marriages. The fact is, anyone with even a little life experience (and that would be everyone who has reached adulthood) knows of horrific marriages, abusive situations, suffering spouses, and grave sin. I daresay even Jesus Christ Himself (God!) knew intimately how badly and how often His creatures sin against each other and in marriage, yet His edict against divorce is explicit and repeated—and explicitly repeated by St. Paul as well.

2. How is it that the official teaching of the Church (Scripture, Catechism, Canon Law) can be placed in front of people’s eyes time and again, and yet those teachings are not acknowledged or given assent? Each time I am confronted by the “what about abuse!” folks, I ask that they provide evidence of my error, of where I am contradicting or distorting Church teaching. I am careful to use official sources from the universal Church, and I’ve had canon lawyers/tribunal judges vet the most controversial things. However, in trying to discuss facts, there is too often snark, anger, obfuscation, and emotion in return.

And yet, there is no ambivalence…

This is the mind of the Church, from Pope Leo XIII in 1880 (emphasis mine):

When, indeed, matters have come to such a pitch that it seems impossible for [spouses] to live together any longer, then the Church allows them to live apart, and strives at the same time to soften the evils of this separation by such remedies and helps as are suited to their condition; yet she never ceases to endeavor to bring about a reconciliation, and never despairs of doing so. (Arcanum)

This is the mind of the Church, from Canon Law (emphasis mine):

1153 §1. If either of the spouses causes grave mental or physical danger to the other spouse or to the offspring or otherwise renders common life too difficult, that spouse gives the other a legitimate cause for leaving, either by decree of the local ordinary or even on his or her own authority if there is danger in delay.

§2. In all cases, when the cause for the separation ceases, conjugal living must be restored unless ecclesiastical authority has established otherwise.

The Church, in mind and teaching and law, gives permission for physical separation, but always with the hope of future reconciliation. Even should circumstances require separation to be indefinite, the marriage bond remains, with no “moving on” of the spouses. And, although in limited cases the Church will “tolerate” civil divorce if it’s the “only possible way of ensuring certain legal rights” (CCC 2383), such a decree does not make one “unmarried”—and Catholics must never adopt the dangerous mindset that it does.

How many of us know and understand the mind of the Church on this? Further, how many of us fight for the mind of the Church on this?

Venerable Archbishop Fulton J. Sheen both understood and fought:

Christ’s teaching on marriage and family is foundational, not incidental. It’s rooted in the order of creation itself, from the Garden, and we must understand and fight.

Which brings me back to the thoughts I’ve had this week: Why are Catholics wholly unfamiliar with the mind of the Church on the issue of divorce, even in hard cases? Why don’t we know this? Who never taught us? When did we stop being taught? Do we even want to know this? Do our shepherds not want us to know this anymore? Or, do they not know, either? Do we still desire to know those things which make a difference in our salvation, the difference between heaven or hell? Why are we happily ignorant, even fighting to maintain ignorance, and unconcerned with the truth of things?

I implore Catholics to stop shutting down the conversation, especially on clear teachings that we have not been clearly taught. Instead, we must humbly begin to learn again what the Church teaches, and not be defensive in the learning. Peace of mind comes before peace of heart, and knowing the mind of the Church will show us the mind of Christ. There is peace and holiness in the knowing.

“My people are destroyed for lack of knowledge” — Hosea 4:6